Holsteins Has a Big Fat Greek Burger

Michael Movestro reviews the Big Fat Greek Burger at Holsteins…

This Holsteins review was going to be an Eggslut review…but, the line. The long, long, line that seemed to grow and grow because of the line douchebaggery that occurs when one person is holding a spot for 15 of their friends. But there wasn’t only one person was holding a spot for 15 friends, more people were holding the line for 15 friends. The line grew and grew in front of me. I don’t do lines very well when I’m on an empty stomach. In fact, although I’m a very patient person (most of the time) I certainly only have so much patience in reserve when I haven’t had breakfast yet.

I stepped off the line, and, what great luck; Holsteins was right there. I remembered someone suggested I give Holsteins a try so now was a good time as any. A new burger experience? I’m down! I walked in and was promptly seated. There was a decent crowd at that time, but the place wasn’t packed. It did become busier as I ate. I took a look at the menu; there was a good amount of choices in the burger variety. Something caught my eye, however, something with just the right amount of kitsch to it…The Big Fat Greek Burger.

‘BIG FAT GREEK’ greek spiced lamb with feta cream, lettuce, tomato, red onion, & olive relish, w/ tzatziki sauce

Yep, that’ll do. The waiter came by and took my order. Soon, free popcorn arrived. “Pizza-flavored popcorn” as it was described to me. It was…”only ok.”

It was popcorn with spices, it isn’t anything out of this world. Soon enough, the Big Fat Greek Burger arrived.

Protip: Although it looks like a burger, it doesn’t taste like a burger. It tastes like a Gyro, on a bun. Your brain might play a trick on you, as you’re holding the burger and about to bite in, your brain will expect a burger taste, not a gyro taste. It just does (you reading this, Mark from 360 Vegas? It is mind-fuckery). It was good, it was tasty, and if you really like gyros you’ll like this burger. I don’t see myself ordering one again, though, for me, it was more of a one-time-kitsch kinda thing. I got the experience, but, I’d like to try something else next time. I hear the Gold Standard is great! I remembered to take a pic of the receipt for those of you who like that sort of thing.

Holsteins is located on the second level of the Cosmopolitan.  Hours: 11am – 12am most days, however, on Friday, Saturday, and Monday they close at 2am.

[Photos: Michael Movestro]

Michael Movestro

Michael Movestro founded Vegas Bright to continue the tradition when Vegas Chatter cashed out. Michael pays the bills, maintains the site, writes articles, hosts VBN – Vegas Bright Newscast.